CoParenting Through Difficult Times
This is one of the most challenging task. It is especially difficult while you are still in the middle of the settlement and final details of the divorce. Emotions are normal and part of the process of letting go and accepting the loss, but they take time. I hear so many stories of how women and men are fighting over the children and putting the children in the middle of their arguments. This is so damaging for the child and everyone concerned. You understand, but how do you put these emotions aside when you must talk to your former partner about children issues. Here are some tips:
l) Vent your feelings before you engage in conversations with your ex-partner about your children. Talk to a friend, write in your journal or simple talk out loud to yourself and release you frustration, anger and negative feelings. This way you will be grounded when you engage in the conversation.
2) Tell yourself that the highest good of your child/children is for you to have their other parent involved and for your child to see you interact in a mature manner.
3) Write your thoughts down on paper and prepare your conversation so that you are brief, stay focused and do not drift to your unresolved emotional pain with your ex-partner.
4) Praise yourself for your efforts, and congratulate yourself for not acting out your pain during your co parenting conversations.
By staying grounded and calm during your co parenting conversations you are staying empowered allowing your healing to occur more quickly.
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